Tuesday, May 11, 2010

A Tribute to Deanna

Everybody else seems to be doing blog postings that honor their mothers, and I was beginning to feel like a slacker. I don't have any good recent pictures of my mother. Most of the images I have are from before she went to New York to get her doctorate and get skinny. She'd be embarrassed if I put up one of her old fat pictures, but she'd also be embarrassed if I put up one of her new skinny pictures, so I'm going to put up some photos that represent her awesomeness.

She's like the statue of liberty, except that her arms get tired more quickly and she hasn't corroded green.

She's like Xena, but she's not quite as handy with sharp frisbees and she's not as much of a Lesbo.

She's like Queen Elizabeth, but her family is a little more functional and she's more anxious for her son to take over for her.

She's like a gazelle, but wears clothing more often and has fewer ticks.

She's like Florence Nightengale, except she believes in the germ theory, and though Florence Nightengale might not be able to beat up your mom, my mom could beat up your mom. And she would, so keep your mom away, for her own safety.
Love you, mom.


Anonymous said...

That's the most moving tribute I've ever read to a mom -- I love you, too, sweet handsome boy. And who said I believe in germ theory?

Love you, Mom

Rachel said...

So nice, Jon. I wish I would have thought to compare mom to a gazelle. Then she would like me as much as she likes you.