Saturday, April 25, 2009

Will someone PLEASE give those kids something to DRINK?

WHAT? You don't like baby goats? You don't like pictures of my kids feeding baby goats? What, so you don't want to see our girls feeding baby goats just because we've already put up about 10 posts featuring our girls feeding baby goats? Are you TOO GOOD for baby goats??
Are you mad because Lucy feeding a baby goat is cuter than YOUR child feeding a kitten? Well she is.
Does it make you furious to see our charming daughter Samantha tenderly dispensing nourishment to a white kid? Perhaps it should.
Does seeing our gifted child cut off other children in tractor-traffic fill you with parental road-rage? Is THAT your problem? Well all the other parents at the tractor track sure had some issues.

Don't give me that look. Don't you DARE give me that look that says "why is this picture smaller than all your other pictures?" I'll CUT YOU.
Do your inner thighs have splinters? Do your INNER THIGHS have SPLINTERS????? HA!!!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Some Things

To be perfectly honest, I'm not entirely sure who these people are. Sam and Lucy managed to take some candy out of their house anyway.

This is us in what I suppose are our Easter outfits. We actually celebrated something of a Passover in that Nora's RSV and Lucy's sinus infection finally seem to be passing over.

This is a giant, edible caterpillar. Will it eat you...or will you eat it?

This is She-Ra Becky manhandling the girls through the Kansas City Zoo. That woman to the right might be named "Brenda."

The thematic subtleties and the nuanced cinematography that went into producing "Charlotte's Web 2: Wilber's Great Adventure" are best appreciated at distance of 3-4 inches.

Next Week: Bootylicious.

Sunday, April 5, 2009


It's not that we're trying to diminish Chrissy and Gordon's last post in which their little son, Spencer, had thrown up on his father. I'll admit, it was impressive for an infant.

Chrissy,'re kids are going to get bigger. As are their stomachs. I'm just glad her only ammunition was milk and apple juice.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Calm down

Ok, you bunch of up-tight ninnies. Of course it was fake.
The recipe was something like this:
1 cup of peanut butter
2 Tbs cocoa
1 cup powdered milk
1/2 cup powdered sugar
Some honey

Becky made this "edible play-dough" for the kids and Sam pointed out that it looked like poop. That gave Mom the inspiration to form a nice juicy turd and eat it out of a diaper in front of Dad when he got home from work. The pictures were taken afterward.
It really is surprising to me how offended some people can get when they're shown a picture of someone else ingesting feces.
Here's some pictures that have less excrement.

This is Samantha, who was awarded with some make-up for doing her chores. Now she's a common tramp/geisha who does her chores.
Here are the older girls caressing a deer.
Here is a guy who is enthusiastic about the restaurant inside the Bass Pro Shop.
Here is a baby that is cuter than your baby.
Here is a gorilla sleeping under a blanket because it's really cold outside at the zoo. Or your mom.

It'd be nice if she would do this AT BEDTIME.